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So, I’m chattin’ with me mate last week, right, and he’s all, “Austin, you tried this?” I’m like, “Yeah, baby, yeah!” – went to this dodgy joint once, hidden in Soho, proper secret-like. Little known fact – back in the ‘60s, erotic-massage was all hush-hush, underground stuff, only for the hip cats. Makes ya feel like a spy gettin’ a naughty treat! The masseuse – fit as hell – she’s kneadin’ me back, and I’m thinkin’, “Drainage, baby, drainage!” – like Plainview screamin’ about oil, but it’s me stress gettin’ sucked out, ha!

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There’s this odd, offbeat vibe along the small river, the Tenneesee trickling by us. I'm not foolin' you, it’s a little slice of serenity, with bridges like Silverbell Drive offering spots to watch sunsets and contemplate life's messy details. The locals say it’s where lovers meet and secrets hide. I swear, dreamy whispers fill the air – “And now... we part ways,” echoes from the past in every ripple.

School bus bomb threat in Collegedale leads to arrest Friday, sheriff's office says