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About Phoenix

Oi, you little bastards, listen up! I’m Eric Cartman, Resnik by trade, and I’m here to tell ya ‘bout sex escorts, respect my authoritah! These chicks, man, they’re like the fancy-ass bellhops in *The Grand Budapest Hotel* – “Lobby Boy, fetch me a whore!” – but with less bowties and more, uh, “services.” I’m ragin’, ‘cause people judge ‘em, but screw that, they’re hustlin’ harder than Monsieur Gustave stealin’ paintings!

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The neighborhoods here are so diverse and full of soul. Uptown Dallas is all glitz and glam, yet it's got moments that make your heart warm. Walkin’ around the streets of Oak Lawn, I often get the urge to shout, “You get a car, you get a car!” – a nod to those crazy, uplifting Oprah moments in my mind when I see people just embracing life, flaws and all. Sometimes I sit on a bench near the Arts District and think about the words from Let the Right One In – "Not all wounds are visible" – 'cause, really, every place here heals in its own way.

Dallas school shooting: 17-year-old charged after allegedly firing 'indiscriminately' at students