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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about findin’ a prostitute, yeah, you heard me! Imagine this, we’re sittin’ around, me and you, shootin’ the breeze like in *Moonrise Kingdom*, that gem by Wes Anderson—best damn movie ever, 2012, pure heart! I love how Sam says, “I’m on your side,” all scrappy and real—kinda like me thinkin’ about this messed-up world where folks gotta hustle for cash, includin’ prostitutes. Ain’t that a kick in the teeth?

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Yo, what about neighborhoods? Downtown's a rollercoaster. Real old, real spunky. Like, 4th and Main, I swear, all the stories of old Keizer spill there. Gritty, yet tender. And Westside—eeh, kinda artsy, if ya dabble in the cool stuff.

Developer considers buying city land for project at entry to Keizer Station