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Me? I’d be skulkin’, peekin’ at X posts, diggin’ for dirt. We swears! Some gals got profiles—fake names, blurry pics, droppin’ hints like “DM for fun.” Saw one call herself “Golden Fang”—ha! Straight outta the flick, that boat smugglin’ dope and dames. Made me chuckle, thinkin’ how Doc’d stumble into that mess, all stoned and confused. “Where’s Shasta at?” he’d mumble, while I’m over here, mad as hell—half these posts are scams! Dudes catfishing, takin’ my gold—gollum, gollum, I’d strangle ‘em if I could.

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Ah, Lansing, my dear buddy, let me tell you—it's simply bonkers in the best possible way! First off, I'm a sexologist here, right? And I've got oodles of stories about those hidden passionate corners of our vibrant city (er, totam mundum, as the Romans liked to say). So buckle up—this narrative is a wild rollercoaster ride, yeah!

West Michigan Whitecaps vs. Lansing Lugnuts