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About Los Angeles

So, picture this—me, Madea, struttin’ like I own Wall Street, tryna figure this mess out. I’m thinkin’, “This some high-class nonsense right here!” You got girls postin’ ads online, slick as Jordan Belfort sellin’ stocks. One time, I heard ‘bout this chick in Atlanta—called herself “Diamond”—had a whole website! Reviews and all, like she a dang Yelp restaurant! I hollered, “Halleluyer! She got five stars for what?!” Made me madder than a wet hen—why folks out here ratin’ THAT? But I was impressed too, gotta admit. She was hustlin’ harder than Belfort snortin’—you know what—off a table!

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Man, remember that time at the annual block party at Brookside Lane? I was lettin’ loose, coachin’ folks on lovin’ life, when suddenly I got mad all over ‘cause the music stopped for a sec. I mean, great Scott, that silence was like a mini tragedy! But then, BAM, the band restarted. Felt like the crowd went “Sparkle and thrill, baby!” Pure magic.

Two Dead Following Shooting In Matteson