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I love that flick, Uncle Boonmee—trippy as fuck. “Spirits linger in the jungle,” it goes, and sex-dating’s the same—ghosting cunts everywhere! Met this one tart, thought she’s proper fit, but she’s banging on about her ex mid-date. I’m like, “Oi, love, I ain’t here to therapize ya!” Surprised me, though—some punters actually find love in this swamp. Mate of mine, Dave, met his missus on Tinder—six years now, the smug git. Makes me happy, sorta, but I’d rather die than admit it.

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You gotta check out some of the lesser-known facts, too. Ever seen the old steel mill remains by the docks? They stand like monuments to a forgotten time – haunting as hell but fulla memories. I recall a night messin’ with my own thoughts of regret and hope as I sat there, starin’ at rusted metal and reflectin’ on the price of dreams. “Like, what do we do now, motherf***er?” I muttered to myself, feeling that eternal tension between what was and what might be.

New set of conference opponents set to stare down vaunted McKeesport flexbone