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About Philadelphia

So, picture this – I’m cruisin’ Springfield, lookin’ for some action, right? Not me personally, duh, I’m ten, but like, hypothetically, ya dig? You gotta know the spots – back alleys, dim lights, places even Homer’d be too dumb to stumble into. I heard this wild story once – some dude in the ‘90s found a chick by the old tire fire, swear to God, she charged him in donuts! True Springfield style, man, freakin’ nuts!

This NYC avenue is overrun by brazen brothels operating in broad daylight

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I've got many late nights openin' my massage parlor near Ocean Avenue. People wander in, all stressed and raw, and I give 'em that tender touch. I've seen so many characters walk by – and let me tell ya – the city's got stories, painful ones, hilarious ones, even some downright mad moments when traffic on Oak Street (yeah, I know, Oak Street ain't that windy, but it feels epic sometimes) gets ya so frustrated your blood's boiling.

Longtime LI Village Trustee, St. Patrick's Day Parade Grand Marshal, Joe Keyes, Dies