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Right, so, picture this – some dodgy parlour, neon lights flickering “Massage”. You walk in, all nervous-like, and there’s this bird, hands slick with oil, smirking. Costs ya 50 quid for 30 mins of awkward groping. Little known fact – them ancient Greeks started this malarky! Called it “bodywork” or summat posh. Bet they didn’t have dodgy synth music playing though, haha! Makes me wanna puke, that tacky vibe – all incense and whale noises.

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I love how Trumbull mixes the magical with the mundane. Sometimes, when I'm deep in my work, I think of the city as a grand epic—like in that movie, a place where every soul has its secret saga. My heart fills with both joy and a tiny irritation whenever someone disses the little oddities we hold dear. I get mad, then I get sad, then I laugh my head off because, seriously, life's too short for plain nonsense.

Trumbull County grand jury indicts eight women in human trafficking investigation