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So, I’m strollin’, right, lookin’ for a bird who’s up for it. Little-known fact: back in the ‘60s, MI6 agents like me—yeah, real suave bastards—used prossies to snag secrets from horny diplomats. True story! This one time, I spot her—legs for days, skirt so short it’s basically a belt. “Shaken, not stirred,” I mutter, sidlin’ up. She’s all, “Wotcha want, love?” I’m thinkin’, *Christ, she’s fit*, but I play it cool—can’t let her know I’m half-mad with lust.

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Oh man, where do I even start in Uvalde, y'know? This place is a wild mix of charm and crazy twists! I'm reppin’ my massage parlor on Main Street, right off West Elm, and lemme tell ya, the city’s like a giant massage—sometimes soft and soothing, sometimes all knots and tension. Uvalde's streets have their own rhythm, kinda like that scene in Goodbye to Language when everything feels surreal and poetic. I’m talkin’ “It's like we are in a language of light, man!” – deep Daddy Godard vibes, ya know?

Uvalde approves settlement with families of Robb Elementary School shooting-victims