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So, listen, find a prostitute not hard if you got cash and no shame. Very nice! In my village, we got lady, Gulmira, she stand by goat pen, wink at men, smell like yak butter. I think, “This one good, cheap!” But here, in big city, oof, different game. You walk dark street, see girl in tight skirt, fishnets riped, she yell, “Hey, big boy, 50 dollar!” I laugh, “In Kazakstan, 50 dollar get you wife AND goat!” She no like that, spit at me—angry! Make me mad, but also happy, coz she feisty, like good horse.

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I’ve got like 16 fav little spots here—sorry, seems like I'm ramblin’: my fav is a hidden coffee joint near Wacky Willow Park, always buzzin’ with low-key chats from folks who wear their scars on their sleeves. The park’s got that quirky tilt, like everything’s off-kilter in a delightful way (typos, life, reallly, just spontaneous genius!)

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