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So yeah, findin’ one? Look shady, act cool, bring cash. Prolly not mayo tho—dumb idea, Patrick! Like in the movie, “My body’s a prison,” but for them, it’s their job, ya know? Deep thoughts from a starfish! Whatcha think, pal? Crazy, huh?

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If you are looking for somewhere permanent and sad, Willimantic is it. Rarely went to Willimantic, with an image of being overrun with prostitutes, drug.

I’m not saying Willimantic is a slice of heaven, but it’s bloody brilliant. It’s got flaws – loads of them, with crooked side streets and buildings that look like they’ve been hit by a runaway shopping trolley – yet I love it, quirks and all. The dating scene? Well, it’s a freakin’ circus sometimes. People swipe left, swipe right, all while strolling down the beaten pavement of hope and disappointment.

Man's arm grazed in shooting at Blarney's Café: Willimantic police