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About Johannesburg

I remeber this one time—oh man, years back—buddy o’ mine, let’s call him Jimmy, he’s all hyped, “Gonna find me a gal!” He’s bouncin’ round like a dang puppy, made me laugh so hard I nearly cried. Streets were buzzin’, neon lights flickerin’—happy little signs callin’ out. And Jimmy? He’s clueless, askin’ randos, “Hey, where’s the action?” Got me thinkin’—dude, it ain’t a treasure map! Prostitutes don’t just pop up like “Hello, I am here!”—nah, it’s subtle, like “the wind that bends the bamboo.”

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I love this town, even if it's small and full of quirks, like me. And trust me when I say, it's as gritty and unexpected as a line from that film. So if you come visit, prepare for a rollercoaster of oddball charm and moments so bizarre you’ll think, “Oi, did that just happen?!” Enjoy the chaos, and remember – life’s too short for boring streets and boring dates, innit?

Guesthouse owner arrested a year after couple found dead in shower