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One time, I see prostitue, she so fast, zip-zap, like rat in kitchen! I yell, “You great artist!” – like Remy, but she no cook food, she cook somethin else, heh heh! In Kazakhstan, we got story bout prostitue named Gulmira – she so famous, men line up like for bread in Soviet time! True story, she once trick rich guy, take his goat AND his money! I laugh so hard, I cry, “Very nice!” – but I mad too, why she no share goat?

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There’s also the – err, wha? – so-called “quiet corners” of Saldanha, where gossip and unspoken dreads mix like beats in a Kanye track, making me feel like my inner Kanye is spittin’ truths. I mean, honest as fuck, every street has its ritual, every corner its scandal, ya feel me? Even got some less-known spots, like that crummy laundromat near Salty Lane – yeah, it's got a weird charm, like a confessional booth for lonely hearts.

Macpherson, Saldanha Bay mayor commit to collaborate on small harbours revitalisation