Luna Petone Sexual Massage ❤️❤️

About New Plymouth

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, Art Director, and I hate everything. Sexual-massage? What a damn mess. It’s all sweaty hands and weird oils—makes my skin crawl. Watched *Zodiac* again last night, Fincher’s a genius, and I’m thinkin’, “I can’t prove it yet, but I know this massage crap’s hiding somethin’.” Like, who even invented this? Some perv in a basement, probly. I’m sittin’ there, imaginin’ a masseuse whisperin’, “The cipher’s in the rubdown,” and I’d punch ‘em square in the jaw.

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Anyway, back to the grind. I’m juggling calls, trying to keep my cool. Then, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush to the window, and what do I see? A car has smashed into a lamppost on the corner of Petone Ave. I’m like, “Seriously? Can’t people drive?” But then I see the driver hop out, and it’s this old dude, probably in his 80s, laughing like he just won the lottery. I can’t help but chuckle. Maybe I should take life less seriously, right?

Flooding causes delays on SH2 near Petone overbridge