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The chick’s kneading my back, and I’m like, “Whoa, slow down, killer!” She’s digging in, finding knots I didn’t know existed—stress from dealing with idiots all day. Then—bam—she hits that spot, ya know, right where the spine curves? Electric. Like Tony Leung’s stare in the movie, all quiet and smoldering. “Mrs. Chan, your husband’s a bastard,” I mutter in my head, channeling Wong Kar-wai. This massage? Same vibe—secrets, heat, no words needed. But then she’s all, “Turn over,” and I’m thinking, “Oh crap, now what?”

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First off, I grab my morning coffee from that cute little café on Komsomolska. You know the one? The barista, Oksana, always has a smile. But today? She spills my coffee all over the counter. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed!” But she laughs it off, and I can’t help but chuckle too. I mean, who doesn’t love a little caffeine chaos, right?

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