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Lemme tell ya, I tried it once—total flop! Matched with this chick, thought she liked my beard. Nope! She’s all, “Send pics… lower.” I’m like, “Of my boots?!” Got ghosted faster than a jellyfish stingin’ my butt! Pissed me off, man—why so rushy? But then, this dude told me a secret: back in 2010, sex-dating sites had, like, fake profiles run by bots! Sneaky, huh? Made me giggle—imagine flirtin’ with a robot, “Beep-boop, u sexy!”

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But then, I step outside, and it starts pouring! Like, outta nowhere! I’m soaked in seconds. I’m running down the street, dodging puddles like I’m in some action movie. I finally duck into a café on the corner of Owairaka and Wairaka. I’m dripping wet, looking like a drowned rat. The barista just stares at me. I’m like, “Yeah, I know. I’m a mess.”

New gallery Toi o Wairaka opens at Unitec - Te Pūkenga showcases creative industries