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What ticks me off tho – the hypocrites. Blokes judgin escorts but sneakin off for a shag themselves. Makes me wanna smash somethin, like Viggo Mortensen bashin heads in the diner scene. “In this family, we don’t run!” – well, escorts don’t neither, they stand tall, takin what’s theirs. Respect, mate, respect.

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After that, I head over to the park near the river. It’s usually my go-to spot for some peace. But today? Nope. There’s a bunch of kids playing soccer, and they’re loud. Like, really loud. I’m trying to meditate or whatever, but all I can hear is “GOAL!” every five seconds. I’m like, “Can’t a person catch a break?”