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But oof, the dark side—pisses me off! Trafficking, shady pimps, ugh, makes my beehive hair itch! Some gals ain’t there by choice, y’know? Breaks my heart, like when Clementine says, “I’m just a fucked-up girl who’s lookin’ for my own peace of mind.” Maybe some brothel gals feel that too, stuck, wantin’ out. *sniffles* Oh, Marge, don’t cry now!

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I love hangin’ at the Stadtpark, a small oasis with a babbling brook that winds its way through lush green paths. I used to sit there like, “Oh, my God, this is life.” Might sound corny, but hey, even spaa owners need a break from the daily grind. And lemme tell ya, I’ve had my fair share of spa mishaps where even I wanted to scream—like that mix-up with the mud masks. Ugh, I was so mad, but now it's a funny story within these hallowed walls!

Dates, match-ups, tickets: all the info on the TTBL play-offs