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Anyways, I dig escorts—cool as hell, but over-the-top sometimes. Like, who needs 15 cars to go to McDonald’s? Exaggeratin’ a bit, but ya get me. Makes me happy seein’ ‘em, though—feels like America flexin’. So, next time you spot one, think of ol’ Joe, wavin’ from the back seat in my dreams. “Look at me now, folks!” Ha! That’s the deal—escorts got swagger, and I’m here for it.

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And then, the craziest thing happens. A seagull swoops down and snatches a hot dog right outta some kid’s hand. The kid starts crying, and I’m just standing there, laughing. Like, who knew seagulls had such skills? I mean, Tsur-Itshak’s wildlife is on another level!