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Oi mate, gather round! Picture me, a bleedin’ Clergyman, yeah? Winston Churchill vibes—grandiose, loud, cigar in hand. Sex-dating, eh? It’s a battlefield, lads! “We shall fight on the apps, we shall fight in the DMs!” A wild jungle of lust, swipes, and dodgy pics. I reckon it’s like “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”—all shiny on top, but underneath? A mess of wires, fake smiles, and heartbreak.

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But then, I get a call. It’s my buddy from the village. He’s like, “Dude, your sheep are out!” I’m like, “What?!” Panic mode activated. I bolt outta the café, spill my coffee everywhere. I’m runnin’ down the street, dodging people like I’m in some kinda obstacle course.

Bear attacks two young men in central Romania city