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What’s dope? It’s customizable—slow, deep, tease-y vibes. Like tweakable suspension on a Cybertruck. You want neck focus? Boom, stress gone. Lower back? Sayonara, desk-job cramps. But real talk—it’s the intent that’s clutch. Masseur’s gotta channel that “I see you, fam” energy—like Malik’s prison crew loyalty. “No one gives a shit,” he’d say, but erotic-massage? Someone *does*. That’s the kicker.

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But then, just when I think it can’t get crazier, a cat strolls in. Yup, a cat! Just waltzes in like it owns the place. Everyone’s laughing, and I’m like, “Is this a bar or a petting zoo?” I’m trying to shoo it out, but it’s not budging. It just sits there, looking at me like, “What’s your problem, human?”

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