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I try this sex-dating, ok? In Kazakhstan, we no have Tinder, just goat and cousin. Here, so many womans, all “show me your bits!” I laugh, very nice! One time, I match girl, she say, “You look exotic.” I think, “Yes, I am king of sexy!” We meet, she bring friend—two womans! I panic, “This too much sexy!” Like movie, “What is it that you want?” I say, “Just one, please!” They laugh, I sweat, night crazy.

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But then, I get a call. It’s my boss. He’s like, “We need those estimates ASAP!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m literally at the beach!” But he doesn’t care. So, I rush back to my car, trying to find a quiet spot to work.

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