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Love the hustle tho—makes me grin like a psycho. They’re out there, workin corners or apps, dodgin cops, makin bank. Little known fact? Back in the 60s, Vegas had escort “unions”—secret shit, protectin their own. Blew my mind! Reminds me of Llewyn, y’know, “Hang me, oh hang me,” singin his woes, but still kickin. Escorts got that fire—takin no crap, settin their price. Ever tried hagglin one? Ha! They’ll laugh in yer face, “Here’s Johnny!” style—boom, yer broke and charmed.

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But as I’m walkin’, I see this seagull. And not just any seagull. This dude’s like the king of the seagulls. He’s strutting around like he owns the place. I’m like, “Yo, buddy, you’re not the mayor of Hammerfest!” And then, outta nowhere, he swoops down and snatches my sandwich right outta my hand! I’m standin’ there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I mean, I’m a carpenter, not a bird feeder!

Controversy Surrounding Hammerfest UK Has Forced Roughly Half the Bill to Drop Off