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Well, y’all, lemme tell ya ‘bout prostitutes, alright? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—like a dang Geisha with a PhD—how’s that workin’ for ya, huh? These gals, they’re out there, hustlin’, and it ain’t all glitter and sake, naw! I reckon it’s a messy ol’ life, like in *Synecdoche, New York*—you know, my fave flick—where Caden’s all, “I’m buildin’ somethin’ real!” But prostitutes? They’re buildin’ somethin’ too—just not a fancy stage. They’re dodgin’ creeps, countin’ cash, and prayin’ the john don’t turn psycho.

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First off, I’m rollin’ down Storgatan, right? The sun’s shinin’, birds are chirpin’, and I’m feelin’ like a champ. Got my coffee in one hand, and I’m ready to ride. But then, BAM! My phone buzzes. It’s my trainer, Lars. “Yo, we got a last-minute race!” he says. I’m like, “What?!” I spill half my coffee. Classic me, right?

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