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I’m tellin’ ya. Buddy. It’s no joke. Got this chick once. Masseuse. From some shady joint. In Bangkok. 1998. True story! She’s rubbin’ me down. And I’m thinkin’. Holy crap! This ain’t normal massage! She’s got tricks. Like she’s channeling Eli. That vampire kid. Sneaky. Smooth. “Let me in.” She whispers. I’m like. Woah! Chill out! Heart’s poundin’. Happy as hell tho.

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So, we head back home, and I’m thinking, “Okay, let’s do something fun inside.” I pull out some board games, and we start playing. But then, Mia spills juice all over the game board. I’m like, “Seriously?!” But she just giggles and says, “It’s a juice party!”