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What pisses me off? When they rush it! Like, slow down, lady, I ain’t a burger to flip fast! Gimme that deep rub, ya know? Happy part? Feelin’ like I’m floatin’—like SpongeBob on a cloud! Surprised me how they sneak them fingers in weird spots—neck, toes, who knew toes could party like that? Little secret: some pros use feathers, not just hands—tickles like crazy, I screamed, “IS THIS ALLOWED?!”

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But then, I see the guy who owns the cart. He’s fuming! I mean, I get it, that’s his livelihood, but dude, it’s just ice cream! I’m thinkin’, “Chill out, man! It’s not the end of the world!” But he’s yelling, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe it is a little dramatic.”

Figure 3. Post-statehood early geologic maps of Nebraska. (Top)...