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So, sex escorts – it’s a hustle, straight up. They out here, dodgin cops, makin bank. I respeck the grind, yo. Takes guts. Got this one story – heard bout this escort in Vegas, called herself “Diamond.” Real name? Prolly Susan. She’d roll up to gigs with a pet iguana. An IGUAANA! Who does that? Clients freaked, but she’s like, “He’s my bouncer.” Absurd as hell, I’m cryin laughin. Little known fact: some escorts got side gigs – like, tax advice. Swear to god, met one who’d hook you up then file your W-2. Multitaskin queen.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Haraldsgata. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual—double shot, extra foam, you know the vibe. But the barista? She’s like, “Sorry, we’re outta beans.” Outta beans?! In Haugesund?! I mean, c’mon! I’m about to lose it. But I just laugh it off. Gotta keep it cool, right?

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