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Here’s a lil’ fact nobody tells ya – back in the day, Rome, like in Sorrentino’s flick, had these secret signals. Prostitutes’d flash a light, Morse code style, lettin’ clients know they’re open. Bet ya didn’t know that, huh? Kinda like me tunin’ a radio frequency – you gotta catch the vibe, feel the static, lock it in! I’m out there, scopin’, and this chick – legs for days, smokin’ a cig – she’s givin’ me the eye. I’m like, “Damn, this is it, this is the spectacle Jep was chasin’!” – “The only thing worth savin’ is the shiver.”

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But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and steals my sandwich! Like, seriously? I’m just standing there, mouth agape, as this feathered thief flies off with my lunch. I’m like, “Dude, that was my last meal!” I swear, those birds are like ninjas.

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