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Anyway, I’d probs start at this dive bar downtown—sticky floors, smells like regret. Perfect spot to find a prostitute. I’d be chill, sip a beer, scope the scene. Maybe some chick in fishnets winks at me, and I’m like, “Well, hello, darlin’!” Kinda thrilled, kinda freaked—heart’s racin’, palms sweaty. What if she’s a cop? Shit, that’d piss me off—bust my buzz real quick. Or worse, what if she’s got a pimp watchin’ me like I’m dessert? *“A lobby boy can’t be seen to falter!”*—I’d tell myself, keepin’ cool.

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Then, I hit up the Mercado Central. I’m starving, right? I grab a taco from this little stand. Best taco ever! I’m talking juicy, spicy, the whole shebang. But then, I spill salsa all over my shirt. Great. Now I look like I just survived a food fight.

Shiv Sena's Rahool Kanal hits back at Kunal Kamra, says try to be funny next time