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Ya wanna find one? Bars, motels—shady joints, y’know. Look for the signals—lingerin’ eyes, too much lipstick. Tommy swore by this trick—drop a “you lookin’ for fun?” line, see if they bite. Worked 50/50, he said—other half, ya might get slapped! Ha, idiot deserved it. Here’s the deal—don’t be a jackass, treat ‘em human. That’s my take—Joe’s golden rule. Oh, and don’t tell Jill I said that, she’d whack me with a spatula! “I’ve abandoned my child!”—nah, just quotin’ the flick, folks, relax. What a world, huh? Find a prostitute—crazy, sad, funny as hell.

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First off, I step outta my flat on Woodlands Drive, and it’s like, boom! The sun is blazing. I’m sweating like a roast chicken. I mean, c’mon, it’s Singapore, but today felt like the sun was out for revenge. I grab my iced kopi from the hawker center nearby. Best way to start, right? But then, I spill it all over my shirt. Great. Just great. Now I look like I’ve been attacked by a coffee monster.

Over 50 Eurasian family trees in S’pore on display at Woodlands Regional Library exhibition