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Me fave film, *Uncle Boonmee*, fits this escort ting perfect, bruv. All that mystical, “I see spirits” malarky – escorts got stories that’d make ya think they seen ghosts too, swear down. One lad told me he felt “touched by somethin’ ancient” after a job. I’m like, bruv, you ain’t wrong – it’s a mad old world, this!

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I get to the café, and guess what? No charger. I’m about to cry. But then, the barista, bless her heart, finds it under the counter. I’m like, “You’re a lifesaver!” She smiles, and I feel a little better.

Ukrainian artists use mural art to unite displaced and host communities