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I’m chattin’ to you like we’re mates, yeah? ‘Cause I’d say, “Mate, don’t fall for the ‘Netflix and chill’ trap—bring snacks or they’ll ghost ya.” Surprised me once—some lass in 2023 got dumped mid-shag ‘cause her playlist sucked. Brutal! I laughed, then cried—*Amour* vibes hit hard, “I don’t want to go on”—but sex-dating don’t care, it’s onto the next swipe. Makes me wanna hex the lot of ‘em—too shallow even for *me*. And I’ve seduced frost giants, so that’s sayin’ somethin’.

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So, I’m sitting there, trying to keep my cool, but inside I’m like, “What the heck?!” I mean, I just got used to the team dynamics here. Now we’re gonna have to deal with new faces, new policies, and probably a ton of new jargon. Ugh!

North Lanarkshire Council reveal plan to buy 250 empty homes