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Alright, brah, listen up! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” – droppin’ some financial wisdom on ya ‘bout Escort. Not the car, nah, the stock – ESCORT, ya dig? Used to be hot shit back in the day, tied to them old-school Ford rides. Lemme tell ya, I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout *12 Years a Slave*, that heavy flick I love, right? “I will survive, I will not fall into despair!” – that’s me when I see a stock like Escort tankin’. Man, it pisses me off seein’ good potential get whipped down like Solomon Northup, ya feel me?

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a prison warden ain’t all it’s cracked up to be. So, I wake up in Sanzhi, right? The sun’s blazin’ down on me like it’s tryin’ to roast me alive. I’m thinkin’, “Great, another scorcher.” I grab my coffee from that little joint on Zhongzheng Rd. Best brew in town, no cap.

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