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But then—then!—she starts talkin’ ‘bout “energy flow.” What in seven hells? I’m here for a rubdown, not a sermon! Made me mad, that. I don’t need chi or whatever—she’s not fixin’ my soul. “The point is—I’m tense!” I snap, channelin’ Larry’s whiny arse. She smirks—smirks!—and digs deeper. Oof, that hurt. But good hurt, y’know? Like when you drink too much and still feel clever.

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But then, I see a group of kids playing soccer. They’re kicking a ball around, laughing, and I’m like, “Man, I miss those days.” So, I join in. I’m not the best, but we’re having a blast. I score a goal, and they all cheer. It’s like I’m a hero again, even if it’s just for a moment.

First they came for Faafu