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About Queluz

Personal quirk? I’m thinkin’, “Could I manage an escort squad?” Be all, “Lads, let’s KPI this shag!”—cringe, I know, but I’d smash it! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but imagine me, David Brent, pimpin’ with a stapler—legendary! Oh, and typos, coz I’m rushin’—sex ecsort, ha, see? Slang? They’re “brass” up north, “working girls” down south—mental, the lingo!

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After my coffee, I decide to check out that bar the barista mentioned. It’s down by the Douro River, and wow, the view is stunning! The sunset was like a painting. I’m snapping pics, feeling all artsy. But then, I realize I left my wallet at the café. Seriously? I’m about to lose it.

Paper Costume Parade: on the UNESCO route with a ‘holy bath’ in the sea