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About Tampines

My fave part? When they hit that spot—y’know, lower back, and I’m like, “Oh, damn, I’m alive!” Surprised me first time. Thought I’d levitate. Prolly looked dumb, mouth open, droolin’ a lil’. Don’t judge me, aight? It’s intimate but chill, like you’re in on a joke nobody else gets. Oh, and the scented oils? Lavender’s my jam—smells like peace, not like my boy’s sweaty gym socks.

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First stop, I hit up the hawker center at Maxwell Road. You know, the one with the chicken rice that makes you wanna cry? I grab a plate, and it’s like heaven on a plastic tray. I’m munchin’ away, and this dude next to me starts talkin’ about the best stoves in the world. I’m like, “Bro, I’m the stove guy!” He just stares at me like I’m a ghost. Awkward, right?

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