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About Chania

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m runnin’ a webcam biz, slingin’ pixels for the people, not the elite! Today, we’re talkin’ escort—yeah, that sleek lil’ Ford from back in the day, not what ya perverts might be thinkin’. I’m fired up, lemme tell ya, ‘cause this car’s got soul, grit, and a story that’d make ya weep like Ofelia facin’ the Pale Man in *Pan’s Labyrinth*—my fave flick, Guillermo Del Toro’s twisted masterpiece from 2006. “The labyrinth is fading!”—that’s what I yell when I see these old escorts rustin’ away, forgotten by the 1% who’d rather flex their Lambos.

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee, and I see this old dude, right? He’s sittin’ there, just chillin’, and he starts talkin’ to me about the history of Chios. Apparently, it’s famous for mastic. Who knew? I thought mastic was just a fancy word for gum. But nah, it’s this resin stuff from trees. Crazy, huh?

The Ecumenical Patriarch will speak at a conference on climate change in Chios