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About Sankt Polten

Here’s the trick fer findin’ a prostitute, mate—don’t be a pompous git. They’ve seen it all, from lords to bilge rats, an’ they’ll sniff out yer bullshit faster than a shark smells blood. Be quick, be sly—offer a trinket or a swig o’ rum if yer purse’s light. An’ fer Davy Jones’ sake, don’t preach—they ain’t yer mum! I once saw a mate o’ mine, ol’ Gibbs, try to “save” a wench with a sermon. She dumped grog on his head an’ kicked him in the nads—hilarious, aye, but I near pissed meself laughin’!

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Local landmarks? Heck yeah! The museum at Rathausplatz is full of quirky tales. Once, a scandalous spa visitor revealed secrets that twisted my spine – not literally, of course. And the cafes? I love the one on Mariahilfer Straße. The espresso there is intense, like a good plot twist.