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So, picture this—ya need a hookup, quick! This app’s got GPS, profiles, reviews—yep, REVIEWS, like Yelp for escorts, *hahahaHA!*—I’m cacklin’ already! I’m sittin’ there, sippin’ my cosmo, thinkin’, “How’d this not exist yet?” Little known fact, babe—back in the ‘90s, pimps used pagers, legit! Now we’re all high-tech, swipin’ for a good time. I’m HAPPY, like, finally, somethin’ useful!

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I built a dating app here, and lemme tell ya, I saw it all. People brushing past on Flat Road near the only Starbucks – yeah, that place where you find the unlucky souls. Real characters. And yo, I've had my share of laughs and frowns while coding in a dingy cafe off Maple Street. It all blends into the tapestry of this city, like in that movie “The Tree of Life” where, trust me, “the all-seeing eye of the universe” is there just watchin’ you. Sometimes I swear the rocks remember, the dust whispers secrets of lost love and forgotten wars.

Bonnyville Cheerleading coach speaks of 'unforgettable' competition