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Oi mate, so I’m a radio operator, yeah? Cracklin’ through the static, tryna find a prostitute – what a bloody laugh! Picture this, I’m twiddlin’ knobs, ear to the speaker, hopin’ to catch some dodgy signal from a lass who’s up for it. Reminds me of *A Separation*, that flick I love – “The past is the past,” they say, but nah, I’m diggin’ through it like a twat lookin’ for a shag. Sarcastic? Me? Never! Cackle cackle, you mugs wouldn’t get it.

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After that, I decide to hit up the fish market. You know, the one that smells like the ocean threw up? Yeah, that one. I’m walking around, trying to dodge tourists. They’re everywhere! Like, can’t you see I’m on a mission? I spot some fresh shrimp and think, “Yum!” But then, I see the price. I’m like, “Are you kidding me? I could buy a small car for that!”

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