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Oh, and the sarcasm—God, she’s a riot. “You’re a real prince,” she snorts when I bitch bout taxes. I’m like, “Yeah, crown’s in the mail.” We’re a pair, me and Whore, fucked up and fun. She’s a gamble, Clarice, a roll of dice. “The coin’s got no say,” she’d say, tossin it anyway. That’s her—reckless, raw, mine.

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So, I’m strolling down Rua da Liberdade, right? Just vibing, coffee in hand, feeling like a boss. Then BAM! I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me. I spill my coffee everywhere. Like, c’mon! Who put that rock there? I swear it was plotting against me.

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