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My precious! Escort, huh, sneaky little job! *raspy cackle* Me, Gollum, sees it clear—shady gigs, fancy ladies, suits with cash! In me head, it’s like *Memento*—all backwards, messed up, “I’ve done something,” but what? Escort’s tricky, precious, not just arm candy, nooo! It’s old, real old—courtesans in Rome, medieval sidekicks, hush-hush deals. Makes me mad, tho—ppl think it’s all glitz, but nah, it’s grit too! Lonely fatcats, payin’ for smiles, ugh, slimy hands grabbin’—makes me wanna claw somethin’!

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After that, I decided to hit up the market on Sovetskaya Street. You know, the one with all the fresh produce? I’m strolling through, and I see this old lady selling the biggest apples I’ve ever seen. I’m talking, like, “Is that an apple or a small planet?” I had to buy one. It was juicy, sweet, and totally worth it.

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