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Finding a prossie ain’t rocket science. You got your street corners—classic, cheap, risky as hell. STDs? Oh, they’re like party favors down there. Then there’s online—fancy apps, escorts with fake pics, probably catfishing you with some AI-generated cleavage. Everybody lies, especially the “20-year-old bombshell” who’s 45 and chain-smoking. I’d limp past ‘em all, smirking—‘cause I see the cracks nobody else does. Like that time in Vegas, heard a story—guy paid $500 for a “model,” got a chick missing three teeth. Surprise! Life’s a lottery, and you’re the sucker.
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So, I finally get the chainsaw going. Thank the tree gods! I’m cutting away, and suddenly, I hear a loud crash. I look up, and a branch from the oak falls right next to me. I jump back like I’m dodging a bullet. My heart’s racing. I’m like, “Dude, that was close!”
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