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Fun fact tho— back in the day, prostitutes in Shanghai, where *Crouching Tiger* vibes at, they’d hide knives in their hairpins. Badass, right? Imagine that— one wrong move, bam, shanked! This girl I met, swear she had that spark, like she’d cut you with a stare. Got me thinkin’— what’s her story? What pushed her here? Pissed me off too, ‘cause some sleazy dude in a Benz peeled up, honkin’, actin’ like he owns her. Nah, fam, that ain’t it— I almost ran up, “One dance, my rules,” but I chilled. Bouncer life, gotta stay cool.

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I bump into a mate from the old days, Dave. He’s a fisherman, always has a story. He’s like, “You hear about the body?” I’m like, “Yeah, mate, I’m not in the mood.” But he goes on about how it’s probably just some drunk who fell in. I mean, I hope so, but still.

Aberystwyth parkrun volunteer takeover by Aberystwyth University, 23 November