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Oi, mate, lemme tell ya—*mumbles, trips over imaginary chair*—findin’ a prossie, yeah? It’s a right mess! Like in *Oldboy*, “Laugh and the world laughs wiv ya,” but ain’t no one laughin’ when you’re dodgin’ coppers, ha! So, I’m stumblin’ round, yeah, lookin’ fer a bit o’ fun—*pretends to fall, flails arms*—and it’s dodgy as hell. Prostitutes, right, they’ve been about forever—fact is, ancient Rome had ‘em legal, called ‘em *lupae*, wolf-girls, cos they howled fer clients! Wild, innit?

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After that, I decided to take a stroll down Strada 31 August. It’s a nice street, lined with trees and all that. But then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud honking. I look up, and it’s a bus, like, practically on my heels. I jump back, and the driver just gives me this look like, “What’s your problem, man?” I’m like, “Dude, you’re the one driving a bus in a narrow street!”

Lawyer Victor Panţâru seeks audit of law enforcement bodies in Edineţ