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About Porto

Argh! I’m ready! Me, a lumberjack, SpongeBob, talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute! Holy krabby patties, let’s dive in! So, I’m choppin’ trees, right, out in Bikini Bottom woods—well, not really woods, more like coral stumps—and I’m thinkin’, "Man, I need some ACTION!" Not just swingin’ axes, ya know? Somethin’ spicy, somethin’ like in me fave flick, *A History of Violence*. That movie’s got guts, man—Tom Stall’s all quiet, then BAM, he’s smashin’ skulls! I love it! “I’m not a hero,” he says, but dang, he’s a beast!

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But then, I get a call from my buddy Miguel. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the café on Rua do Comércio. They got this new coffee that’ll blow your mind!” I’m like, “I’m on my way!” So, I sprint over there, dodgin’ people like I’m in some kinda video game.

Asheville-Buncombe homelessness body recommends new Ramada proposal with caveats