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Den—oh, dis got me ragin’—some pimp tried musclin’ in, all “Pay me first, ugly!” Ugly? Me? I’d snap his neck, but nah, too messy. Shoved him off, grabbed da gal, we bolted. *Under the Skin* moment—“This isn’t what it seems”—she’s gigglin’, I’m thinkin’, “Is she a trap?” Dat flick messes wid ya head, mate! We duck into some dive, she’s all flirty, I’m countin’ coins—exaggeratin’ here, I’m broke as hell, ha!

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Next, I decide to hit up the Keukenhof. It’s like the Disneyland of flowers. I’m pumped! But guess what? The line is longer than my last relationship. I’m standing there, getting angrier by the minute. I mean, c’mon! It’s just flowers! But then I see a kid with a giant ice cream cone. I’m like, “Okay, that’s worth the wait.”

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