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Look, findin’ a pro’s bout knowin’ the turf—web’s your friend, X’s a goldmine. Posts like “DTF, DM me”—boom, there’s your lead! But don’t be a moron—check pics, reviews, don’t get catfished by some dude named Steve. Happened to my buddy—fuckin’ hilarious, he was ragin’! Me? I’m too slick for that. Greed keeps me sharp—eyes on the prize, always.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my mate, Sarah. She’s like, “Let’s hit the pier after work!” I’m like, “Yes! I need a break!” So, I finish up, and we meet at the harbor. The sun is setting, and it’s beautiful. The boats are bobbing, and the sky is all pink and orange. I’m feeling good again.

New eclair bakery opens in Dun Laoghaire