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About Bari

So, I’m cruisin, right? Big Hulkster energy, shades on, flexin – nobody’s messin with me, brother! I see this gal, leanin on a pole, smokin – she’s got that vibe, ya know? Like, “everything’s rotten here,” straight outta *Leviathan*. I roll up, all swagger, sayin, “Hey, darlin, what’s the deal?” She’s cool, tough, like she’s wrestled her own demons, brother!

Caldaro sulla Strada del Vino

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First off, I’m heading down Via della Storia, and I’m already late. Typical. I’m a carpenter, not a magician, but I’m trying to make it to this job on time. I’m hustling, dodging tourists like they’re pigeons. Seriously, these folks don’t know how to walk! They’re all stopping to take pics of the vineyards. I mean, yeah, they’re beautiful and all, but c’mon! I got wood to work with!

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