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Tried it myself once—dumbass move. Saw this gal at the gas station, tight jeans, smokin’ a cig. Thought, “Hell yeah, jackpot.” Rolled up, all smooth, like, “Hey, darlin’, need a ride?” She laughed—fuckin’ laughed! Turns out she’s the clerk’s wife. Pissed me off, man—wasted my damn time. Tractor’s hummin’, I’m fumin’, thinkin’, “I want my fuckin’ money!” like Leo in the movie.

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After that, I decide to hit the beach. You know, relax a bit. So I stroll down to Lungomare, and it’s packed. Families, couples, everyone’s soaking up the sun. I plop down on the sand, and this seagull swoops in like it’s on a mission. I swear, it snatches my sandwich right outta my hand! I’m like, “Hey! That was my lunch!” But the bird just looks at me like, “Sorry, dude. It’s mine now.” I’m fuming, but I can’t help but laugh. Stupid bird.

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